BookWire - Meet The Author - Mary Muscari, Ph.D., RN, CRNP

Former Yonkers, NY city-slicker, now Pocono, PA country bumpkin, Dr. Mary Muscari has worked with thousands of children from tots to teens -- many with psychosocial problems, including violent behavior. An Associate Professor of Nursing at the University of Scranton, she is a certified pediatric nurse practitioner and a certified psychiatric clinical nurse specialist (therapist). Besides writing Not My Kid: 21 Steps to Raising a Nonviolent Child and two pediatric nursing books, she writes chapters for academic textbooks, and numerous articles for scholarly journals and regional newspapers. Her writing centers on child and adolescent health issues, particularly violence and eating disorders.

Muscari has Ph.D. in nursing from Adelphi University, where she also earned a postmaster's certificate in psychiatric nursing. She holds a master's degree in pediatric nursing from Columbia University and a bachelor's degree in nursing from Pace University. She earned her RN from the Cochran School of Nursing, at St. John's Riverside Hospital in Yonkers, following the footsteps of her grandfather who worked there as a nurse and nurtured her career with hospital stories and chocolate milk.

Neela Sakaria: Thanks for joining us Mary. Can you please start by telling us how you got involved in child development, and how you came to the point where you decided to write NOT MY KID?

Mary Muscari: I wanted to work with children ever since I was one and began my pediatric career at age 19. But it wasn't until I neared my 30th anniversary in child health that I decided to write "Not My Kid." That decision came after reaching the frustration point with the youth violence epidemic. I decided to combine my pediatric, psychiatric and writing careers to push the issue of prevention - the core of a nurse practitioner's practice!

Neela: NOT MY KID is based on the premise that violent tendencies in children can be prevented. Can you talk a little bit about this notion?

MM: Although some children are born with problems such as low intelligence and impulsivity, children aren't born violent. They learn violence at home or in the community from parents, other family members, or friends. Even in the best of homes, children can learn violent behaviors from the plethora of violent media and violent people around them. Children who witness violence see it as a means of solving problems and tend to become violent themselves. Violence is learned, and thus it can be prevented. Research demonstrates that much of this violent behavior can be decreased and even prevented if risk factors are seriously reduced or eliminated, especially if intervention occurs during early childhood. I utilized this research, along with my years of experience and good old-fashioned common sense to come up with the 21 steps which actually represent hundreds of smaller steps critical to raising nonviolent children.

NS: What kind of research was involved in writing this book? How long did it take?

MM: I analyzed nursing, medical, psychological, and educational research findings and the reports of several experts and organizations (American Academy of Pediatrics, American Psychological Association, American Psychiatric Association, and others) on violence, child development and parenting. Thanks to modern technology, it only took about two years.

NS: In chapter ten, you focus on anger management. What are a few of the key things that parents and children can do to control anger?

MM: Here are five important things parents can do for their children to help them control anger:
a. Help your children know when they are angry, as some children don't immediately recognize this emotion until it is expressed inappropriately or it escalates into hostility or rage.
b. Let your children know that it's okay to be angry, but that it's not okay to act on it in a negative manner such as hitting or throwing things.
c. Teach them problem solving so they don't resort to violence when angry.
d. Encourage them to count to ten and talk things out when conflict arises.
e. Foster their sense of humor because humor frequently defuses anger.

NS: In addition to your extensive background in nursing and your work in healthcare, you also have experience writing articles as well as screenplays, correct? Can you tell us about that and how that fits into your goals as a writer? Might you consider writing a screenplay some day?

MM: I'm a graduate of UCLA's Professionals Basic and Advanced Screenwriting Programs, so I have already written screenplays as well as scripts for educational and recruitment videos. As a writer who loves fiction as much as fact, I hope to continue writing for educational videos but also strive to see my screenplays come alive on the big or small screen -- particularly my nonviolent family feature scripts!

I await your call, Mr. Spielberg.

NS: Tell us how writing this book has been different from your previous work in writing?

MM: This is my largest consumer project thus far. I wrote nursing books, but "Not My Kid" was more challenging and rewarding. Parents are a demanding audience. And they should be, since they face the world's most difficult job 24/7.

NS: What kind of response has your book gotten so far? And from what audience?

MM: I'm pleased to say that the response has been extremely positive. I was quite flattered that the book was endorsed by the Center for the Prevention of School Violence who recommended it for both parents and professionals. As a nurse and a writer, that particular endorsement validated my work. Neela: Are you working on any other writing projects at the moment?MM: I'm always working on writing projects. I recently finished the script for the video to accompany this book. That project is now in post-production for a January 1 release. Right now I'm rewriting one of my screenplays (again), and planning the sequel to this book as we are planning a "Not My Kid" series.

MM: Of course, I never miss the chance to hoist myself up on the soapbox when offered.
I'd like everyone to realize that children are our most valuable resource and that they are not just small adults. Despite some evidence to the contrary, we are not a child-oriented nation. If we really cared about our children, they wouldn't be killing each other. Therefore, I ask each and every reader to get involved and to show their children that they love them by raising them to be nonviolent.