Before the Chop

I have been living in Los Angeles for over thirty years. Since 1981, when I first arrived to now, the LA Weekly has had an ubiquitous presence in the city.

Years ago, in the back of the Weekly, there was a gossip column that had a revolving cast of contributors who sent in their reportage to fill the page. For some reason, these people would use me as a figure of fun and made sport of me quite often. Even up to a few years ago, I would get an e-mail from someone asking me if I had read about what was said about me in the LA Weekly.

And then, in August of 2010, Shelley Leopold and Gustavo Turner, two very good people at the LA Weekly, asked if I would like to be a contributor with an occasional feature or editorial. Since it was them asking, I said sure.

I started out posting a dispatch on the LA Weekly site later that month. My primary goal was to get out the play list for my Saturday night radio show on KCRW FM.

In November of 2010, Gustavo asked me if I wanted to interview Nick Cave about his Grinderman II album and turn it in as a feature. I said yes. I believe that was my first time being in the print version.

Early the following year, Gustavo said he really liked one of the things I had posted and wanted to put it in the print version to see what the response was. He did and people seemed to like it. He asked me to contribute on a weekly basis. I have been doing that since February of 2011.

Anger is my motivation for writing the column. To Ms. Molyneaux and the like, I’m some jackoff named Shecky. Believe me, I got it and I never forget. When I read something like the example I provided, I cannot explain to you how much it inspires me. Turned on doesn’t even begin to cover it. It reminds me that I have eaten more kinds of shit than they will ever have to and I am still here. This is why I overachieve. I live to bury people like this.

I have no idea how long this job will last. I keep sending pieces in and they keep printing them. So far, it’s been a good thing.

Due to space limits, the editor must trim the piece and often sees fit to change the title I sent in to something I would never say. I don’t mind any of this. I know the editors have a job to do, and ultimately, my version will end up right here . . . original form and title intact: Before the Chop.

My allegiance is to you. It always has been. It’s the only reason I do all this in the first place. -- Henry