The Gospel of a Prodigal Son

This 'book' didn't start out as anything more than an essay I sat down to do for some religious website or my Facebook page except the thoughts started flowing, pouring out of me. In that regard then it is a work born out of years of frustration, pondering questions of faith, feeling a hunger for more substance to what we've been taught, wondering why most Christians seem so 'unlike' the Christ. I remember well the disappointment and alienation during my early church life for daring to...
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This 'book' didn't start out as anything more than an essay I sat down to do for some religious website or my Facebook page except the thoughts started flowing, pouring out of me. In that regard then it is a work born out of years of frustration, pondering questions of faith, feeling a hunger for more substance to what we've been taught, wondering why most Christians seem so 'unlike' the Christ. I remember well the disappointment and alienation during my early church life for daring to think 'outside the box' which is what I felt life had become in those days. Finding myself older and still having some of the same questions, I decided to look at everything I have been taught about myself, God, the world, religion and spiritual matters. I don't claim to be a prophet, an apostle, holier-than-thou, or to have reached Nirvana. I have sinned and made mistakes. On my best behavior and after the most sincere prayers, still yearning for that moment when I could say 'I got it' and I would be transformed and all would be well - I looked in the mirror and there I was. Still 'me'. I looked and there I was with some of the same thoughts, the same desires all of which were contrary to any likeness of God. But God is wonderful, profound in how he can use people, situations, things, even pets to get through to us, to see Him, to feel Him, to break through when we've closed our hearts to Him, to love.When my ex-wife was stricken with ARDS (acute respiratory distress syndrome) and lay in bed too weak to pick up a phone, feeling herself dying, our dog Sonny would jump on the bed and lick her face which helped her hold on. He felt what was happening to her. We were separated at that time and I wasn't staying at the house. I felt I just had to go there that night for some reason though friends tried to talk me out of it. I arrived in time to get her to a hospital where she recovered after 3 weeks in an ICU ward.It was while out on a date, that my lady friend who had not ever mentioned 'God' before, brought Him up posing the question as to whether God had somehow protected her sanity from a near psychotic, bi-polar mother and allowed her to develop the bubbly, sweet personality that I hope she turns to God for His glory. That was THE turning point for me: when a sinner who never had tried to know God could consider the possibility of His love and care for her, I had no choice but to turn to Him and come home.The last four months, I have looked at life through documentaries on faith, religion, history, spirituality, social issues, and health. I've dug through books, searched the web, read the Bible, read spiritual books, prayed, meditated, everything... only to find it still comes down to: are you willing to know the truth? Regardless? And when you find it are you willing to accept it and make the changes necessary in your life? The truth of what Jesus really taught, what he wanted us to know and do IS available to those willing to seek for it. The greatest problem with the church, that is those who love Jesus and want to follow him, is not a lack of desire or love: it is what they have been taught and told is not true to the Source. We live in a WYSISWYG world, but for us Christians that has been reversed: WYGISWYS. Just as Jesus said, the fruits of our lives - what we believe, what we think - is manifested in the world by our words and actions and the results of those words and actions. We are the children of our parents. In this case our single parent is supposed to be God, our Father. But are we at all like Him? Our teacher is Jesus. Are we at all like him, the Son he sent to teach us? If not, why? And why has almost 2000 years past and we refused to acknowledge it and change?Maybe we don't want to; in a more kindly way maybe because we really think all is well. "We are right, and they are wrong". That is part of the deception. It is time to see through it and realize the truth of the Son of Man.