A More Perfect Union

It's easy to fall for the Cinderella fantasy of marriage, sketched as it often is with black-and-white strokes: the pledges of undying love, the white dress, the happily-ever-after that the wedding industry promotes. But many a woman on the verge of nuptials finds herself feeling pedestalized, psychically separated from friends and family. Her fears, anxieties, and trepidation may be tamped down, leaving room only for the more acceptable emotions of excitement and joy. In A More...
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It's easy to fall for the Cinderella fantasy of marriage, sketched as it often is with black-and-white strokes: the pledges of undying love, the white dress, the happily-ever-after that the wedding industry promotes. But many a woman on the verge of nuptials finds herself feeling pedestalized, psychically separated from friends and family. Her fears, anxieties, and trepidation may be tamped down, leaving room only for the more acceptable emotions of excitement and joy. In A More Perfect Union: Poems and Stories About the Modern Wedding, co-editors Virginia Hartman and Barbara Esstman expertly bring together 44 writers who offer up alternative, more realistic and colorful, universes of marital experience. Poet Jennifer Weinblatt's "Marriage Song for Many Voices" may strike a chord with many such brides-to-be: "marriage is a going forth we / don't talk enough about / the loss a risking what we are..," while a heartrending excerpt from Carson McCullers's The Member of the Wedding voices the feelings of those suddenly second-bested by a new groom or bride. And the hilarious "A Memo from Cinderella" puts the lie to the whole fantasy wedding: she had to work on a budget, too! This book also looks forward to the realities of postwedding life. Poet Henry Taylor's stirring "At the Swings" positions the marriage ritual in the larger continuum of life, death, and having children, making the point that wedlock is more than just a pledge between two people. That's an insight that can help any cold-footed crier see her own situation in a clearer light. --Stefanie Durbin