Elizabeth

As Paul roughhoused with their two sons on the living room floor, Randi thought about the love they had for one another. She loved her sons too but there was something more between her husband and the boys-a bonding that she would never know.Their life wasn't perfect but close. Count your blessings was the warning that kept replaying in her mind. Would she be tempting fate to pursue what her heart longed for? The daughter she never had. A little girl she could dress in frilly clothes...
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As Paul roughhoused with their two sons on the living room floor, Randi thought about the love they had for one another. She loved her sons too but there was something more between her husband and the boys-a bonding that she would never know.Their life wasn't perfect but close. Count your blessings was the warning that kept replaying in her mind. Would she be tempting fate to pursue what her heart longed for? The daughter she never had. A little girl she could dress in frilly clothes and shop with as she grew older. Another female in the house to share girly secrets and desires with like she had with her mother. Someone she could bond with.The conversation tonight could become tense. She and Paul had agreed to stop at two children. Her task tonight was to convince him to have another child. Girls ran in both of their families. She just knew in her heart if Paul agreed, this time she would have what she had prayed for and not been given-a girl. "If Paul says yes, then all the craziness of having to deal with a newborn will all be worth it." Eleven months later, she sat in the Bentwood rocker in the nursery and cradled the empty yellow baby blanket in her arms. She rocked gently, tears streaming down her cheeks, as she repeated the one word that had once brought her so much joy-Elizabeth.Bereft of her most precious possession, Randi no longer seemed to know or care who she was. How could she be a mother, a wife, a woman without her Elizabeth? Life had lost its meaning and she had lost her way. Could she go on? How would she ever find her way back from the darkest hour of her soul?